Spiritual direction
Spiritual Direction at SJE
As the Diocese of Oxford explains, Spiritual Direction "is an ancient ministry, sometimes called spiritual counsel, prayer guidance or soul friendship. It is about taking time to meet with someone and talk together about your spiritual journey, prayer and search for God. Many people find that this pattern of reflective companionship can be a significant help." At SJE, one of our parishioners, Tom Armstrong, keeps an office and offers spiritual direction to parishioners or anyone who is searching for a deeper connection to God in their life and would appreciate guidance.
Tom has been an active spiritual director for 3 years. He has earned his Master of Arts Christian Spirituality: Spiritual Direction from Loyola University Chicago (MACS:SD).
Through Loyola he has received extensive training in Ignatian Spirituality. The Ignatian Spiritual Exercises is a foundational part of his experience and practice. “Ignatian spirituality” is a way discerning the movement of God’s Spirit in the human heart, in history, and in the world. It is rooted in the belief that God can be found in all things.
The Ignatian spiritual tradition comes from the Spiritual Exercises of St. Ignatius of Loyola, founder of the Society of Jesus (the Jesuits). “The Exercises,” as they are often called, cultivate a deep and active prayer life built on a personal relationship with Jesus, and this relationship infuses every aspect of life — family, work, school, church, decision-making (aka “discernment”), the pursuit of justice.
Tom is available in person at the church and is usually in his office on Wednesday and Sunday mornings. Other times can be set by appointment. He is also available via Zoom. There is no fee for initial meetings. For longer term spiritual direction, a donation to the Church discretionary fund noted for Spiritual Direction is customary.
Please feel free to ask any questions by emailing Tom at direction@sjegh.com.
Father Cramer also does offer spiritual direction from time-to-time, but being a parish priest precludes him from seeing many people for this more intensive regular time. That's one of the reasons our parish invited Tom to this ministry among us. However, those interested in direction through Father Cramer may always contact him at rector@sjegh.com.
FAQ about Spiritual Direction
What might I talk about? The important thing is that this is a ‘sacred space’ into which we can bring anything but do not have to bring anything. There are no expectations or judgement. It is a listening and accepting space. Sometimes you might have a sense of something happening in your life and needing to make sense of it in a spiritual context: ‘Where is God in this for me?’ Sometimes you might have a particular spiritual issue you want to work through. Sometimes it is as simple as: ‘How can I pray?’ Sometimes it is an individual’s awareness of God inviting them to ‘something more’, and needing help to work out what that is really all about. So the answer to the question is: ‘Anything that impacts on your relationship with God.’
How do I know if a Spiritual Director is a good fit? A good spiritual director is not your own personal great decider. Look for someone who doesn't impose, but can guide so you can make a decision. The spiritual director's role is not to dictate what should be done, but to help you discern the promptings of the Holy Spirit, and to hear God's voice. Compatibility or incompatibility can show up at various levels. At the surface, a spiritual director’s availability and meeting options (in-person or online) may or may not work for you. In some instances, you may also have a strong desire to meet with a director of the same gender, minority background, etc. Or you may find tension or resonance with the theological tradition they practice.
How often would we meet? It can vary from every few weeks to twice a year, with the length of the meeting time varying according to the needs of the directee. However a very common pattern is to meet about once every six weeks for an hour or so.
How long does spiritual direction last? You can meet with a spiritual director once or through a season of discernment or transition, but many people continue with their spiritual director indefinitely. It doesn’t have to have an endpoint. In most cases, it’s wise to try committing to a spiritual director for six months once you decide to begin. Remembering this choice can help you stick through any dry or difficult times.
How is this different than counseling or coaching? Counseling or therapy tends to be solution-focused. You might identify something that needs to be addressed, your counselor identifies a course to take and you work toward that goal with a trained and licensed mental health professional. Similarly, coaching typically identifies where you want to go, where you are and how to get there, often in your professional life. Spiritual direction centers on where you are and how God is there. This doesn’t always lead us forward. Sometimes it’s about how to be more present to what God is already doing, and sometimes it’s about responding to God’s invitation to go deeper into relationship.
Is there a suggested fee or honorarium? Spiritual Direction seeks to serve persons of all economic situations. Because spiritual guides and companions often make their living from this work, an honorarium is customary.